Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful

Remember that Pantene ad in the 80’s where a model flipped her hair, stared at the camera and said with a smile: Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful! I never fully understood that ad as a child. I wondered why would people NOT like her because she is beautiful? As an adult, unfortunately, the concept has started to sink in. Over the past few months, since making my fitness/health journey public, I’ve heard many words of encouragement and compliments (more in the lines of being fit and healthy). However, I’ve also heard comments along the lines of “I laughed so hard when I heard YOU were starting a fitness program”, “You look so happy and fit, I hate you!”, “Bitch”, “Do you eat?” And you know what? I’m actually happy that people are reacting this way because it means that, at some level, it is creating discomfort or at the very least a reaction in them. And when someone ignites that uncomfortable feeling in you then you either act on it by joining them or deleting them from all communications. I speak from personal experience when I say that I strongly believe that when we judge and criticize others, it is more a reflection of our own “things” we are unhappy about than about the person we are criticizing.


In my case, I can’t blame people to say or think these comments. I myself have been guilty of saying them about others, even about myself. I even had the same thoughts towards my now coach whom I love! I, myself, still can’t believe I am doing this whole fitness thing! Believe it or not, it’s funny to me too! ME… Alex… the girl who NEVER exercised, the girl who faked tendinitis in CEGEP to get out of gym class for an entire semester, the girl who considered shopping a sport, the girl whose ab workout consisted of laughing really hard, the girl who ate at the food court more days than not, the girl who would rather buy Spanx or loose fitting clothes than do something about the last 10 pounds, the girl who rolled her eyes whenever someone posted a picture of themselves working out on social media,..I can go on and on. I was the other extreme of who I have become today. And that’s why I get both sides.

Don’t get me wrong, I am by no way a fitness expert or the strongest, fittest person around. I still step out burpees, I can’t do a full regular pushup, I modify the moves of my workouts half the time, sometimes I even modify the modified move! The point I am trying to make is that I finally found something I could do and stick with. I believe THAT is the key to making a change. It’s never too late, it took me 40 years to find a formula that works for me and if I can help others find the same and give them the tools that worked for this former lazy-ass girl, maybe there is something there. Ever heard: “What people think of you is none of your business”. And it isn’t any of my business… and if you are afraid of being judged and criticized by others for taking action then you can just say: Fuck that shit! And move on and do your thang, girl! The best compliment someone can give me today is telling me “If YOU, Alex (of all people), can do it, then I surely can!” And that was the point of me starting this fitness thing from the beginning!

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Alexandra Fioriello

Wellness/happiness/motivation coach who also happens to be a senior marketing research consultant and mom to two amazing yet very assertive and demanding toddlers.

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